If you've been on social media in the past two weeks, you've probably been inundated with thousands of ideas around goal setting, New Years Resolutions, and plans for radical life changes as a new year rolls in.

Whether your energy vibe is all about setting goals and smashing them, or you find this all rather exhausting and overwhelming, we are breaking down the need-to-know details about setting goals, to help you have a more successful pursuit towards change (whatever that might look like for you).

Goal Setting 101

1. Setting goals is an important step. But it isn't the only step.

When we write things down, they become more likely to come to life. But writing them down doesn't mean that they will radically come to fruition. We need to make changes, get uncomfortable and do things differently than we have been thus far. So when you decide you want to achieve something, write it down. But then, look at what needs to change from where you are now. Start with one little step that will get you closer to where you want to be, and once you've mastered it, add in the next step.

2. Success comes from compounding, not radical shifts.

Let's face it - most of us cannot radically change something overnight and see it stick. So when you find something that you want to change, focus on each day and doing your best. Small steps add up to a big goal. Even little efforts add up, versus no effort at all. If you miss a day, don't consider your goal journey over. Do what you can today, and start over tomorrow. It's the small incremental changes that will keep you going for the long-term.

3. The journey is more important than the destination - even with goals.

Grade 9 Physical Education class taught us that you need to have a quantitative goal for success - but often, in reality, that can lead us astray because we view hitting a "number" as success, and missing it as failure. The problem is that in life there are many things we can't control, so if you exercise and improve your health but don't hit a goal weight, that doesn't mean you have failed, despite what your goal setting logic tells you. This means when you decide what you want in life, you need to pay attention to the important habits that will help get you to the end, rather than worry too much about what the end looks like. Effort is important. Final outcome is not.

4. Your mind will try to stop you from going through with change. Notice it, acknowledge it, let it go.

We all have the voices that tell us we can't, we shouldn't, we aren't enough. When you are on the verge of shift, the voices will get louder. They exist to protect us from failure, embarassment, or discomfort. The problem with them, however, is that the things we most want in life likely require us to take on the chance at any of those feelings. So when they come up for you, acknowledge them. Thank them for protecting you, but remind yourself that you are in pursuit of something that your best self wants. Then let them go and move forward.

Goal setting is different for everyone, and to each of us, it may very well mean a very different thing. Whatever it is for you, if you are looking to change something in your life, identify where you want to go, and what you will do to get there. Don't give up on yourself - you are capable, you are worthy, and while we all have setbacks, you are strong enough to keep going.

Looking for something to help you plan what is ahead? Download our free reflection and goal setting guide by clicking here.

#strong #goals #perspective #goalsetting #healthyliving #mindfulness #selflove #attitude #lifechange


As time has gone on, I have grown more in touch with my emotions - the good, the bad, and the ugly. I used to avoid the extreme ends of the emotional spectrum - never too angry, too excited, or too saddened. I lived in the middle - a safe place where I could feel without reaching my peak of vulnerability; and actively avoided all people, circumstances, and experiences that would take me to the edge.

Truth be told, I didn't even realize what I was avoiding until it was explained to me that the things that bothered us in the actions of others are indicators of what we've stopped ourselves from experiencing. As I began to reflect I realized that I couldn't be with people living on the edges of the emotional spectrum - too loud, too angry, too sad - all of these made me uncomfortable. I would hide, avoid, and distance so as to not have to experience the emotions that I myself was avoiding.

Imagine a piano, where the keys on both ends are removed. What does the music sound like? What is possible here in comparison to what is possible when all the keys are in place?

By denying ourselves of our full range of emotions, we limit the possibilities of our lives in the way the piano is limited in the music it can create. When we actively avoid those emotions that make us human, we cut off our ability to truly interact with, learn from, and be touched by the world. While the emotional ends can make us extremely uncomfortable, it is in experiencing them that we grow and become more understanding.

Do you find yourself pulling away from people when they express certain emotions? Perhaps you find yourself rolling your eyes when someone is really loud and excited? Or uncomfortable and feeling the need to fix when someone is crying in front of you? Or perhaps you will do anything to avoid an angry outburst, whether with a stranger or someone you love.

If one of these experiences or something like it resonates with you, ask yourself which emotions it is that bother you the most. Reflect on the following questions:

  • When was the last time you can recall experiencing that emotion?

  • What is your fear surrounding the emotion?

  • What do you believe the emotion says about someone who experiences it fully?

The fear and story we create around specific emotions can be caused by a past experience, or by a personal belief of what something says about us. But no matter what the driver is, it is by our own doing that we deny ourselves permission to feel fully. And in doing so, we force ourselves to play small.

When you find the keys that have been removed from your emotional spectrum, spend time understanding and breaking down what you have told yourself to be true. Give yourself permission to explore the positives that may come from bringing those ends back into the picture. While it will be easy to stay where you are, challenge yourself to grow into this new corner. As you do, you will become more compassionate with others, more understanding of the world around you, and more at peace with the person you are.

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#feelings #emotions #vulnerability #loveyourself #honesty #realtalk #mindfulness


Forgiveness is the most powerful gift we can give ourselves. Through forgiveness, we can access true freedom – free of the past; free of our demons; free of our ego.

Whether it is a global event, a romantic heartbreak, or a disappointment with a friend – any and every time we feel betrayed, disappointed, or hurt; it is remarkably hard as humans to move on. We are angry, saddened, cheated. We have a natural tendancy to wish ill on the person who committed the act, and sit in our difficult emotions, feeling victim to another person’s actions.

When another person hurts us in any way, our ego (the part of us that is concerned with how we are perceived in the world) flares up. Without our control, it quickly steps in, pointing out the other person’s mistakes and wrong doings, and reminding us that we don’t deserve this. And it is right – you do not deserve this. But from this place, the hated grows, the heartache digs deeper, and the resentment boils to a place where you can’t see a time in the future that this will not bother you.

We have all sat in the dark place of devastation – it is the human thing to do. Hell, perhaps you are even sitting there right now. But the good news is: you are not alone, and there is a way out of this icky feeling.

The way out? Forgiveness.

Yep, that’s it. Seem hard as hell? I am with you. Right now your ego is screaming at you – don’t forgive them! When I first embraced the practice of forgiveness, mine did too, and to this day, it still does flare up and scream at me. But here’s why forgiveness is the way out of this place.

We are human – all of us. Which means not a single person on this planet has the entire recipe for how to be perfect. When someone makes a choice that hurts us, our ego wants revenge. It wants to stomp, cry, and tell the world like a toddler in the grocery store who isn’t getting their way.

When we blame others for their actions though, we are also blaming ourselves. For every finger we point, if we truly look at ourselves openly, there are fingers pointing back at us. Because we all make mistakes, any animosity we hold on to around others is also animosity that is being held around ourselves. And this is why forgiveness is the way out of your heartache.

When we forgive others, we open up permission to forgive ourselves. In understanding the humanity of the person we are angry with, we recognize the humanity in us, also. By casting forgiveness and wishing good will, we wash away our need for revenge and instead, invite in permission for our own good will and future happiness.

Forgiveness can be the hardest practice of all. It cannot be done once, but instead, it must be practiced repetitively in your head. This need not be a message to the other person, but rather an internal dialogue with yourself. And keep in mind – forgiveness does not mean you need to bring them back in your life in the same way. There are some relationships that are meant to end. Instead, forgiveness means that you free the person from the chains you hold them in and let them go. In doing so, your chains will also be released, and you will be free.

Whatever the situation, the next time you are holding onto anger, sadness, heartbreak, etc. say to yourself the following:

I am willing to forgive them for the pain I feel

I set them free from the chains, which bind them,

And release myself from those, which bind me.

Please let me see the humanity in our actions

And find forgiveness and understanding

Despite my heartache/anger/sadness (insert your feeling),

I see our shared humanity and wish them growth.

May they be happy. May they be healthy. May they be free.

May I be happy. May I be healthy. May I be free.

Making time to repeat this as you need to will open you up so that you can pass through the dark feelings, and move onwards to that which will serve you better. From the darkness comes the opportunity to find great light.

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#forgiveness #mindfulness #compassion #loveyourself

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